Children are naturally curious and inquisitive. They learn by observing, asking questions, and playing with their friends. Socializing with others starts very early in children as they develop relationships and friendships. Through this process of socializing with others, children learn how to give compliments to friends and family members.
What are Compliments?
Compliments are kind words or statements we say to someone to show them appreciation. Giving compliments can express love or admiration for another person – it is an act of kindness that can mean the world! Compliments can be very powerful words because they convey a caring attitude from the speaker towards the person spoken about. A compliment usually starts with “I like how…” or “I appreciate how….”
Some examples of a situation that your child can give compliments to others are:
- When you go shopping, your child sees a store clerk who is nice to them. Your child can say, “I like how you are nice to everyone.”
- When your child asks for help from a teacher, a food service worker, or someone in the store because they are doing fine, your child can say, “I appreciate how you teach me to do things that I need to do.”
- When someone is kind and gives you their extra plastic bag in the grocery store, your child can say, “I like your giving me a second plastic bag.
- When someone speaks nicely to them, your child recognizes it as sincere kindness. Your child can say, “That is nice of you!”
- When her siblings have fun and play with each other, your child can say, “I like how you play with your brother/sister.”
And many more situations. The possibilities are endless and depend on what happens in your child’s life.
Why are Compliments so Important to Children?
Compliments show that your child sees or hears something that you appreciate and would like to pass it on to the other person. Your child’s complement also lets that person know that they made an impact on your child. They make a difference in someone else’s life!
Compliments can also expand a child’s social skills towards others. When children start receiving compliments, it boosts their self-esteem, and they feel good about themselves. It can help them understand how other people feel when praised or appreciated for something good they do. Your child will learn how to give compliments in order to share their appreciation, love, and kindness with others.
Also, when children learn how to give compliments, they can find out how much power their words have. Your child can learn that their kindness to others has a genuine impact and is meaningful.
With compliments, children also understand what is expected when they receive one. They will know how to respond when someone compliments them so that person can feel good about themselves, too! And keeping the joy going, once your child realizes that she makes a difference in someone else’s life, she will most definitely want to pass that goodness on to others!
Giving Compliments
Introducing the concept of giving compliments is easy and fun! Children love to give compliments because it makes them feel good when they do something nice for others. Children can practice their compliments by giving compliments to each other and adults. Children can also practice giving compliments to adults by pointing out special things about an adult, like special music, hairstyle, or outfit.
Here at NY Baby Steps, we have made it our mission to teach each of our children how important it is to give compliments to others. We are fostering a caring and kind environment among our children and staff. As we believe that children should be treated with kindness, we make it a point to teach them how to give compliments. It is our hope that by teaching the basics of giving compliments, each child will become more confident and kind.
Of course, this is not an overnight process. But with your help, practice through social experiences and fun activities with your child (as well as some gentle reminders!), your little one will soon learn the skill and giving compliments freely to those she loves! To help you in your journey, you may start by considering some tips and strategies below.
6 Essential Tips for Raising Complimentary Children
1. Be Their Role Model
Children learn a lot from the way they are spoken to. When you talk positively to your child, they will be encouraged to do so as well. Hence, you must keep a positive outlook in every situation you have with your child. Of course, there will be a time when you will be upset or mad at your child. But, calm yourself before you approach your child with an angry face and harsh words. In this way, your child will learn to handle his emotions well and understand others’ feelings.
It is also a good idea to use the right words when you compliment other people. The next time you are at the convenience store, pay attention to how nice the salespeople are to you and your children while waiting on other customers. As your children see this, they will know that they should be doing the same thing whenever necessary. If you do this enough times with your child, she will make that connection from you and will be able to apply it in her own life.
2. Pay Attention to Your Little One’s Behavior
Children pick up on the things that you do more than what you tell them to do. So, when your child does something good, and you ignore it, she will think that it’s okay to do it again… and again. But when she exhibits bad behavior, and you seem upset about it, your child will learn from her mistake. The same goes for compliments! Suppose your child sees that you always say nice things about other people and never say anything negative about them. In that case, she will understand that it is not appropriate to say negative things about anyone else. When she only hears positive words spoken by you, your child will realize that the world has many good things to offer.
3. Compliment the Effort, Not the Appearance
One of the essential factors in raising a child who compliments is valuing effort over results. When you compliment your child, do so by emphasizing the good things he is doing and how his hard work made a difference in his schoolwork or how he helped around the house. The goal is not to make your child into an always-smiling kid, but rather to give him some back-up when he needs it the most. By emphasizing effort, children will think that they are never alone in their struggles and will be able to praise others for their efforts.
4. Acknowledge a Good Task and Reward
From time to time, your child may have done something great without you noticing. If this happens, don’t be too hard on yourself! You may have just been too focused on getting things done or had too much on your mind. However, you have to acknowledge a good task that your child has done at the next opportunity, do not let this go unnoticed! Your child wants to know that he is doing something right and will try even harder. To reinforce his good behavior, it is important that you acknowledge it when he does so – whether it is for schoolwork or his attitude in the afternoon.
5. Teach Your Honesty and Empathy
When your child learns to give compliments, he will know that it is important to be kind and honest at all times. Essentially, your child will learn that it is not okay to lie just to get something you want. He will also understand that if he sees someone struggling in life, he should try his best to help. In this way, parents are building a great foundation for their school-age children – and the rest of their lives!
6. Compliment them Often
As much as possible, compliment your child on a regular basis! But do not limit yourself to just one time or one specific incident. Instead, compliment your child daily – every time he does something you see as good. It helps build up a positive attitude in your child and will keep him motivated to do more!
Words of encouragement are powerful to help children build their self-esteem. By encouraging your child, they gain confidence and continue to do good things! On the other hand, if you constantly criticize or blame him for his mistakes and flaws, he will be demotivated and lose interest in doing good things.
7. Explain the Advantages of Giving and Receiving Compliments
If you have the chance, tell children about the benefits of giving compliments. Let them know that they will bring positive energy to the world by giving compliments and keeping the positive vibes going! As a parent, you can explain that people are likely to feel happy and thus live longer by giving compliments. Furthermore, when people compliment other people they like, they respect that person. Giving out compliments freely, then sharing and receiving them freely, is a wonderful way of living!
The Takeaway
Now that you know some tips and techniques to raise a child who gives compliments, you are well on your way to being a good parent! As mentioned before, this is not an overnight process. Whether you are working on your child’s first two or three compliments or teaching him the importance of compliments throughout his life, the approach does not matter as much as it does if you persist in your training. Your little one will learn to give praise freely and handle difficult situations in life with grace in no time at all.
We at NY Baby Steps believe that you have the confidence and knowledge to raise a child who gives compliments with ease. We hope this article helps you on your way. If you have any questions, please contact us, and we will get back to you as soon as we can.
